24 April 2012

This is me right now:

Please excuse this post, logged during billing hours. I'm on hold with RingCentral (and have been for about 10 minutes) and I'm trying to vent my frustration on something other than the poor tech on the other line...assuming she actually comes back...

18 April 2012

Insanity is Relative

Bordon breeds insanity
Satire: Lenny Bruce died for it.
Why? Why not?
We're a silver gleaming death machine.
Insanity is relative to what planet you're on.
It may not be nice to be good...it may be horrible to be good.
God save Tinky Winky!
Master Card. Visa. American Express.
To Dance!
And I obeyed her.
She's a two-way street.
Removing the glove...
The Real Horror Show.
Elvis. Hitler.
Hitler. Elvis.
Technically dead.
What the hell does it matter anyway?
We're all going to die some day.
Some sooner than others.
Actual reality - Act up - Fight AIDS!!!
Right lane must turn left.
He's an "ambi"!!!
If you're not one of us, you are one of them...
Resistance is futile.
The Primal Curse: the moral sense
Who will die first?
The American Dream.
I was pretty. Now I'm prettier.
Self. Not self.
What's it going to be then, eh?
It's going to rain tonight.
Or snow.
You're crazy.
I'm mad as hell, and I'm not going to take it anymore!
We're all mad here.
Technology is lust removed from nature.
Bohemia: a fallacy in your head.
People would be surprised if they knew...
If they knew how much in this world was due to prayer.
There is no God.
All plots move toward death.
I intend to live forever - or die trying.
Point proven.
I love you, you're perfect, now change.
Honor verses the desire for vengeance.
Our strength is often composed of the weakness...
We're damned if we're going to show.
Bisexuals, trisexuals, homo-sapiens...
There's no time for us - there's no place for us.
Night swimming.
Who wants to live forever?
There's always a catch.
Nothing in this life is free.
The Children's Crusade.
In a state of innocence.
Too young to take over, to old to ignore.
The thing that is not.
Vy you? Vy anybody?
O my brothers...
Everything Was Beautiful And Nothing Hurt.
Telegraphic Schizophrenic.
One song, glory.
Logic and proportion have fallen sloppy dead.
I am a homosexual!
Yes, I am going to persevere!
Off with their heads!
Maybe not.
Heaven is partly cloudy.
Earthlings are the great explainers.
Self-interest verses sense of duty.
Brain fade.
Spill its blood!
Cut its throat!
Drink me!
Eat me!
We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are.
And so he betrays me.
I want nothing to do with any of you every again!
I want him, and I want her. But now I can't have either.
I care for nothing, I want for nothing, I feel nothing!
How nice-to feel nothing and still get full credit for being alive.
This is Freedom Hall, my dear. Everyone does absolutely as he pleases...
Just go away and leave me alone.
You Mean Nothing To Me!
Must be bitter.
Dream of Californication.
Power verses fear.
This can be useful in rocketry.
To the stage!
The *new* lost generation.
A sense of the fundamental decencies.
I never do anything I don't want to...
Nor does anyone, but in my case I am always aware of it.
So if I follow you home, will you keep me?
Secret go the wolves.
Fear of dying. Fear of living.
The bell tolls for thee.
Just a bug trapped in amber.
Prisoners of our early indoctrinations.
And the band played on.
Yes, I grok.
So it goes.

[Written/compiled by me during my high school senior year, mostly during Satire class - an interesting insight into the books I was reading and the music I was listening to back in 2001...]

13 April 2012

2012 Spring Armageddon

Rough time, this week. It's almost comical, really. I'd laugh at myself if I wasn't so sleep deprived. SO...

Everything that could possibly go wrong for my husband at work has. None of it is his fault, but it's still stressful. Apparently, many of his coworkers are also having a pretty terrible week: two took funeral leave to bury elderly parents. Chad can hardly be angry with them for prolonging his Week of Hell, but he's dying for a night off.

As if that wasn't enough, most of the electronics in our house are malfunctioning in some fashion. I missed my last two nights of work because RingCentral/my computer/my router/my ISP/etc/etc/etc was acting up. It's a testament to how frustrated and distracted I was that, while on hold with tech support yesterday, I barely registered stubbing my toe (on what, I've no idea)...until I happen to glance down (hanging my head in defeat that no one could fix my issue) and realized: 1. a chuck of skin was missing from my now bloody toe, 2. smears of blood dotted the floor where I'd been pacing, and 3. Aurora was eating the piece of skin. A quick glance at the time, and I realized that the tech was supposed to be at the house any minute. Wild scramble ensued to bandage my toe and clean up the mess before the guy got here...all while still on the phone with tech support (and later my brother-in-law). For good measure, Aurora vomited up the flap of my skin she'd earlier ingested. Perfect!

I'm sure I was a right sight yesterday. Nothing the tech guy tried helped ,but HIS tech guy on the phone was extremely helpful. Anyway, I took the night off, after some extra-long cuddles with Aidan, and read my Nook. And read. And read. And read.

Ah, insomnia. We meet again. Too many things on my mind, besides which, the month of May is fast approaching, and the only good thing that has ever come out of that month was the birth of my little brother. He's a pretty cool kid, but his birth is surrounded by memories of terrible events, which muddy what should have been a joyous occasion. Frankly, I wish I could just skip the whole month...but I know I can't.

I finally fell asleep around 4 this morning. By some grace of God, Aidan didn't wake me this morning, but instead played by himself until Chad got home. Now I'm awaiting a visit from my ISP to hopefully sort out some issues I'm suddenly having with their product (after ruling out everything else). I have little hope that they'll do anything, but at least they're willing to come out in try. Why I'm having this issue now, when for months all has been well, I've no idea.

In any event, Chad and I dubbed this week the 2012 Spring Armageddon. Or 2012 Spring-Pretending-to-be-Autumn Armageddon. May the weekend be better for everyone!

08 April 2012


Now the Green Blade Rises
Now the green blade rises from the burried grain,
Wheat that in the dark earth many days has lain;
Love lives again, that with the dead has been:
Love is come again like wheat arising green.
In the grave they laid him, love by hatred slain,
Thinking that he'd never, never wake again;
Raised from the dead, my living Lord is seen:
Love is come again like wheat arising green.
When our hearts are wintry, grieving or in pain,
Your touch can call us back to life again;
Fields of our hearts that dead and bare have been:
Love is come again like wheat arising green.

(Click here for a nice version by the Smoke Fairies)